Torture Advice/Artifice by Tigre Merde: A Noise-Fueled Joyride You Didn’t Know You Needed
Let’s get one thing straight—Tigre Merde isn’t here to hold your hand and whisper sweet nothings into your ear. Nope. This 2013 release from the US-based noise wizard (courtesy of Ram Horn Records) is more like a cattle prod to the brain, in the best possible way. The album’s two tracks—"Torture Advice" and "Artifice"—are short, sharp shocks that’ll leave you questioning whether you just got punked by sound itself.
First up, “Torture Advice.” If this track were a person, it’d be that chaotic friend who shows up uninvited but somehow makes the party unforgettable. It’s abrasive, sure, but there’s something oddly mesmerizing about how it layers distorted bleeps and bloops over a bed of static fury. You can practically feel the circuits frying as you listen. What sticks with me? The way it builds tension without ever really resolving it—like waiting for a punchline that never comes. Frustrating? Maybe. Addictive? Absolutely.
Then there’s “Artifice,” which feels like stepping into a malfunctioning robot’s fever dream. Imagine if an old-school Atari game had an existential crisis mid-level—that’s this track in a nutshell. There’s a cold, mechanical vibe to it, but also a weird sense of vulnerability lurking beneath all the digital chaos. I kept coming back to the part where the beat drops out completely, leaving only eerie tones hanging in the void. It’s unsettling, yeah, but isn’t that the point?
What’s wild is how these tracks work together despite their brevity. They’re not trying to win any awards for accessibility; instead, they carve out a little corner of sonic hell and dare you to enjoy it. And honestly? I kinda did.
So, would I recommend Torture Advice/Artifice? Depends. If you’re looking for background music while folding laundry, maybe pass. But if you want to shake up your eardrums and remind yourself that music doesn’t always have to play nice, hit play. Just don’t blame me when your cat hides under the couch.
Final thought: Listening to this album felt like being pranked by someone who actually cares about art. Or maybe I’m reading too much into it. Either way, hats off to Tigre Merde for making noise that’s both infuriating and impossible to ignore. Now, where’s my aspirin?
