Do You Feel Crunch In Your AssYellow Bastards by Reductio Ad Absurdum: A Noise-Fueled Trip Through Chaos
Holy crap, where do I even start with this album? Do You Feel Crunch In Your AssYellow Bastards is one of those records that grabs you by the throat, shakes you around for 45 minutes, and then spits you out in a puddle of confusion and awe. Released back in 2012 under Russia’s Provoloka label, it's an unapologetic industrial-noise assault that feels like being trapped inside a malfunctioning factory while someone yells at you in Russian. And honestly? It rules.
First off, let’s talk about "Терроризм Forever!" because how could you not? This track hits hard right from the get-go—like, “oh shit, my ears are bleeding but also kinda into it” hard. The relentless pounding beats sound like they were sampled straight from some dystopian war machine, while distorted vocals scream over the chaos like they’re trying to warn humanity about its impending doom. It’s raw, ugly, and oddly hypnotic—all the things great noise should be. Every time I hear it, I feel like I’m stuck in a bad dream where terrorists have taken over a nightclub, but somehow everyone’s still dancing anyway. Weirdly cathartic.
Then there’s "Хуй Вам,А Не Курилы!" which might just be my favorite title ever (if Google Translate didn’t fail me here). This one sticks out because it’s got this insane mix of aggression and absurdity. Imagine if your angriest drunk uncle decided to make music using power tools and broken glass—that’s what this sounds like. There’s something almost comical about how unhinged it gets, but beneath all the chaos, there’s this weird sense of purpose. Like yeah, it’s messy as hell, but it knows exactly what it’s doing. By the end, I’m left feeling both exhausted and exhilarated, like I just survived a bar fight I didn’t sign up for.
Honestly, listening to this album feels less like enjoying music and more like surviving an experiment gone horribly wrong. But isn’t that kind of beautiful? These guys aren’t making songs so much as they’re creating experiences—loud, abrasive, unforgettable experiences. Tracks like these remind me why I fell in love with noise and industrial music in the first place: it’s not supposed to be pretty or polished. It’s supposed to make you uncomfortable, challenge you, maybe even piss you off a little. And damn if Reductio Ad Absurdum doesn’t nail that perfectly.
So yeah, if you’re looking for background music to chill to, this ain’t it. But if you want something that’ll grab your brain by the frontal lobe and shake it until it begs for mercy, give Do You Feel Crunch In Your AssYellow Bastards a spin. Just don’t blame me when your neighbors start banging on the walls—or when you can’t stop thinking about whatever the hell a “subfrontal zoomorphic disphoria” is.
